THE GAPING HOLE IN A.A.’s PROGRAM

THE GAPING HOLE IN ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

ABOUT 12 STEP PROGRAMS

The only hole in the 12 steps of AA is the lack of empathy by the prerequisite that we are never victims.  The rule (paraphrased see below for full quote) that when there is something bothering us it is always our fault (that we are disturbed) makes way for more shame, guilt, and self punishment.   There is a horrific absence of a way to process abuse, neglect, and emotional trauma.  Emotional hurts and pains are often written off by members as either self-pity or unfounded and selfish character defects.  Furthermore insinuating that emotions are “wrong” says that I as a person am “wrong” because my feelings are a part of me and they emerge from my heart.

pg. 417 BB

“When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation- some fact of my life- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept my life completely on life’s terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes”

The notion that nothing happens in God’s world by accident, well that would mean we have no free-will and humans are nothing short of robots.  We do not have to go to such extremes to make the point that God works in our lives.  The reason people use extremes in conversation is they have spent a life-time not being heard and feel they must exaggerate to be heard at all.  Understandable.

If there were another set of steps to address the wrongs done to us resulting in deep wounds, and emotional devastation the program would be more successful I believe.  These deep emotional wounds have caused the addict much pain. Pain is the very reason that many of us drank and drugged.  WE NEED TO LEARN HOW TO PROCESS EMOTIONAL HURTS RATHER THAN BEING ASHAMED OF OUR VULNERABILITIES AND HIDING THEM AWAY.

Trauma is not an outside issue.  But rather it is THE Issue.  Trauma and emotional disorder is the WHY behind the addiction.

Please don’t hear what I am not saying.  12 step programs are good and have helped millions including myself.   There are some really twisted common belief systems running rampant in AA and NA  .

One common dogma I have seen often is a kind of jealousy over the program.  People will get angry and down right mean if you say that therapy or church or even rehab centers have helped to keep you sober.

We shouldn’t knock supplemental  healing and recovery methods till we’ve tried them.  If people have found “a cure” for addiction and are sharing it who are we to say it’s not successful?  Many  people find answers in places other than AA.  The problem is some addicts who still suffer from low self-worth often attach their own identities to the program.   These insecure addicts seem to think if there is another solution offered other than AA it is a direct reflection on them and not in a good way.

There is an unwritten rule if we don’t wear the identity of ‘sick addict’ or ‘alcoholic, addict’ then our egos will take flight and we will relapse straight away.  If we don’t repeatedly identify ourselves as addicts we will then believe we can drink and drug successfully.  Really, AA and NA are programs designed by addicts, there are bound to be some flaws.  But now advertisements on TV and online are claiming there is a cure.   So the dry drunk AA-er feels put-down by the prospect of a true cure.  The dogma of AA teaches us that the minute we feel cured and no longer need meetings we are sicker than ever.  When really the actual danger lies in the belief that we can drink like normal people.  But alcoholics have an allergy to alcohol that will not disappear except by some rare miracle.

What’s The Cure?

If we truly work the steps, open up in long term therapy, and find our Higher Power we will be cured.  Not cured to drink again, rather cured to not want to drink again, we won’t see drinking as a solution.  Still it’s important also to have fellowship, not necessarily in a program.    Anxiety and depression can be cured as well. Why do so many people get outside help, including Bill W?   We don’t have to fear the word “emotional disorder”. All it means is our healthy emotional process has been stifled.  Often the reason we have stifled it is usually that we were taught at a young age our feelings and processes were wrong. Regaining a healthy emotional process and using it on our most intense past hurts is how we heal core issues and truly recover with God’s help.   It doesn’t mean that AA or Bill W is bad or wrong, it just means that no one taught Bill W this aspect of healing. He was human and did not have all the answers.

Any Negativity is a Character Defect

You don’t take deep pains and hurts and tag them as character defects. That’s absurd and crying is not self pity but rather a key healthy emotional process.  The grieving process starts with feeling the pain not shutting it down.  If we move straight into the “my part (what I did wrong in the past)” and character defects without processing our core pains and hurts of how we were wronged then all we are doing is putting a band-aid on an infected sore.

Why do people scream “OUTSIDE ISSUE” in the rooms whenever someone starts talking about child abuse.  Abuse and neglect are why people become addicts and those who scream “outside issue” the loudest are most likely trying to further repress their own abuse as a child.  People love to sit in the rooms after a horrific bout of drug abuse and swear they had a wonderful childhood.  Many people have no idea what neglect and abuse looks like.  But I guarantee, if these people would actually take meditation seriously and do it on a regular basis, they would most likely remember some form of childhood trauma.

Resentments are never valid-false

All feelings are valid.  Feelings come from our heart, a place of truth.  We get angry for a valid reason.  It’s hanging on to that anger rather than letting it flow out of us in a non harmful way that gets us in trouble and gets us sick with resentment.

Children don’t usually get angry toward adults for no reason at all.  If we were harmed, and many of us were then we are legitimate victims.  Not everything is ‘our fault’ so we mustn’t treat it as if it were.  Sharing our trauma with an understanding and empathic listener who will point out the validity of our hurt and show caring understanding is where the healing begins.   Statements like “I know how you feel”  or “I was abused also and the man is a son of a bitch to do what he did”, shows support, relating, caring and validation.  Empathy not spankings are needed for healing wounds.  And the thing is, many addicts are badly wounded.    Emotional issues are not an outside issue separate from addiction, they are, I believe the biggest reasons behind addiction.

 

 

A Thousand Gods to Choose From

A THOUSAND HIGHER POWERS TO CHOOSE FROM

http://www.recoveryfarmhouse.net/choose-higher-power/

But wouldn’t you want the most powerful God of ALL for your Higher Power?  I must say before delving into these magnanimous gods.  My own Higher Power is Jesus Christ and God the Father creator of all gods both high, low, gracious, and dark. (I believe)  Bible reads “all things are of God”.  Unfortunately I have found that few Christians read, much less believe what their own Bible tells them.  Think about it truly.  God created both light and dark.  It is also written,

“Hath not the potter power over the clay, of the same lump to make one vessel unto honour, and another unto dishonour?” Meaning God created both sheep and goats out of the same lump of clay.

On that note please feel free to read my book “PARADISE FOR THE HELLBOUND”http://www.amazon.com/Paradise-For-The-Hellbound-Laura-ebook/dp/B017ERF86W

2 Corinthians 5:18

 “And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation;”

 

Step 2 and Step 3 of Alcoholics Anonymous tells us we should choose a Higher Power to work the steps.

 

(The blue print is commentary by Laura Edgar)

 

HOW TO TRULY FIND AND CONNECT WITH YOUR OWN HIGHER POWER

Immortals

Article from Wikipedia

 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Greek_mythological_figures
The Greeks created images of their deities for many purposes. A temple would house the statue of a god or goddess, or multiple deities, and might be decorated with relief scenes depicting myths. Divine images were common on coins. Drinking cups and other vessels were painted with scenes from Greek myths.
Major gods and goddesses
Deity Description

god 240px-NAMA_Aphrodite_Syracuse

This goddess would be a fine choice.  I don’t think you can go wrong with Love.

NAMA Aphrodite Syracuse.jpg Aphrodite (Ἀφροδίτη, Aphroditē)
Goddess of beauty, love, desire, and pleasure. Although married to Hephaestus she had many lovers, most notably Ares, Adonis, and Anchises. She was depicted as a beautiful woman, poets praise the radiance of her smile and laughter. Her symbols include roses and other flowers, the scallop shell, and myrtle wreath. Her sacred animals are doves and sparrows. Her Roman counterpart was Venus.

god 800px-7348_-_Piraeus_Arch._Museum,_Athens_-_Athena_-_Photo_by_Giovanni_Dall'Orto,_Nov_14_2009

Another fine choice for a god (Higher Power).

Apollo, lira, dan angsa.jpg Apollo (Ἀπόλλων, Apóllōn)
God of music, arts, knowledge, healing, plague, prophecy, poetry, manly beauty, and archery. He is the son of Zeus and Leto, and the twin brother of Artemis. Both Apollo and Artemis use a bow and arrow. Apollo is often identified as the god of the sun but that is a mistake, Helios is the god of the sun. He become the god of the sun when Rome took the Greek gods and made them their own. In the earliest myths, Apollo contends with his half-brother Hermes. In sculpture, Apollo was depicted as a very handsome, beardless young man with long hair and an ideal physique. As the embodiment of perfectionism, he could be cruel and destructive, and his love affairs were rarely happy; One example was his fruitless pursuit of the Forest nymph Daphne, with his large ego he angered Eros (cupid), which caused Apollo to be shot with an arrow of love and Daphne with a lead arrow of hate. The nymph was turned into a laurel bush, leaving Apollo to worship its leaves. His attributes include the laurel wreath and lyre. He often appears in the company of the Muses. Animals sacred to Apollo include roe deer, swans, cicadas, hawks, ravens, crows, foxes, mice, and snakes. His Roman counterpart was also named Apollo.

god 800px-Ares_Canope_Villa_Adriana_b

I wouldn’t choose this god if I were you, unless your in the army or are at risk of sudden battle and wars.  In which case if you pray to this god he may very likely cause you to excel in your status as a soldier.  And who knows what else he could do for you.

Ares Canope Villa Adriana b.jpg Ares (Ἄρης, Árēs)
God of war, bloodshed, and violence. The son of Zeus and Hera, he was depicted as a beardless youth, either nude with a helmet and spear or sword, or as an armed warrior. Homer portrays him as moody and unreliable, and he generally represents the chaos of war in contrast Athena, a goddess of military strategy and skill. Ares’ sacred animals are the vulture, venomous snakes, dogs, and boars. His Roman counterpart Mars by contrast was regarded as the dignified ancestor of the Roman people. Brother of Hephaestus, also had an affair with his wife Aphrodite, which later Apollo revealed to Hephaestus.

god Diane_de_Versailles_Leochares

Diane de Versailles Leochares.jpg Artemis (Ἄρτεμις, Ártemis)
Virgin goddess of the hunt, wilderness, animals, young girls, childbirth, and the plague. She is often mistaken for the goddess of the moon but that is in fact Selene. In later times she became associated with bows and arrows. She is the daughter of Zeus and Leto, and Apollo’s twin sister. In art she was often depicted as a young woman dressed in a short knee-length chiton and equipped with a hunting bow and a quiver of arrows. Her attributes include hunting spears, animal pelts, deer and other wild animals. Her sacred animals are deer, bears, and wild boars. Diana was her Roman counterpart.

Athena_Enkelados_Louvre_CA3662

7348 – Piraeus Arch. Museum, Athens – Athena – Photo by Giovanni Dall’Orto, Nov 14 2009.jpg Athena (Ἀθηνᾶ, Athēnâ)
Goddess of intelligence, skill, peace, warfare, battle strategy, handicrafts, and wisdom. According to most traditions, she was born from Zeus’s head fully formed and armored. She was depicted crowned with a crested helm, armed with shield and a spear, and wearing the aegis over a long dress. Poets describe her as “grey-eyed” or having especially bright, keen eyes. She was a special patron of heroes such as Odysseus. She was also the patron of the city Athens (which was named after her) Her symbol is the olive tree. She is commonly shown accompanied by her sacred animal, the owl. The Romans identified her with Minerva.
Eleusinian hydria Antikensammlung Berlin 1984.46 n2.jpg Demeter (Δημήτηρ, Dēmētēr)
Goddess of grain, agriculture and the harvest, growth and nourishment. Demeter is a daughter of Cronus and Rhea and sister of Zeus, by whom she bore Persephone. She was one of the main deities of the Eleusinian Mysteries, in which her power over the life cycle of plants symbolized the passage of the human soul through its life course and into the afterlife. She was depicted as a mature woman, often crowned and holding sheafs of wheat and a torch. Her symbols are the cornucopia, wheat-ears, the winged serpent, and the lotus staff. Her sacred animals are pigs and snakes. Ceres was her Roman counterpart.

god Hera_Campana_Louvre_Ma2283
Dionysos Louvre Ma87 n2.jpg Dionysus (Διόνυσος, Diónysos)/Bacchus (Βάκχος, Bákkhos)

WHATEVER YOU DO, DON’T PICK THIS GOD IF YOU ARE TRYING TO RECOVER FROM ADDICTIONS.  SHE IS THE GOD OF WINE, DRUGS, ECSTASY AND MADNESS!

God of wine, parties and festivals, madness, chaos, drunkenness, drugs, and ecstasy. The idea was originally from ancient Chios. This was his “home”. He was depicted in art as either an older bearded god or a pretty effeminate, long-haired youth. His attributes include the thyrsus (a pinecone-tipped staff), drinking cup, grape vine, and a crown of ivy. He is often in the company of his thiasos, a posse of attendants including satyrs, maenads, and his old tutor Silenus. The consort of Dionysus was Ariadne. Animals sacred to him include dolphins, serpents, tigers, and donkeys. A later addition to the Olympians, in some accounts he replaced Hestia. Bacchus was another name for him in Greek, and came into common usage among the Romans.

god Hades-et-Cerberus-III

AS A CHRISTIAN, I WOULDN’T BE SO QUICK TO DISCOUNT THESE GREEK GODS AS HERESY AND FALSE GODS.  For even “Hades” is listed in the Bible and is widely believed as a place in which Christians could end up if they are not careful”.

Hades-et-Cerberus-III.jpg Hades (ᾍδης, Hádēs)/Pluto (Πλούτων, Ploutōn)
King of the underworld and the dead, and god of regret. His consort is Persephone. His attributes are the drinking horn or cornucopia, key, sceptre, and the three-headed dog Cerberus. The screech owl was sacred to him. He was one of three sons of Cronus and Rhea, and thus sovereign over one of the three realms of the universe, the underworld. As a chthonic god, however, his place among the Olympians is ambiguous. In the mystery religions and Athenian literature, Pluto (Plouton, “the Rich”) was his preferred name, with Hades more common for the underworld as a place. The Romans translated Plouton as Dis Pater (“the Rich Father”) or Pluto.
Vulcan Coustou Louvre MR1814.jpg Hephaestus (Ἥφαιστος, Hḗphaistos)
Crippled god of fire, metalworking, and crafts. Either the son of Zeus and Hera or Hera alone, he is the smith of the gods and the husband of the adulterous Aphrodite. He was usually depicted as a bearded man with hammer, tongs and anvil—the tools of a smith—and sometimes riding a donkey. His sacred animals are the donkey, the guard dog and the crane. Among his creations was the armor of Achilles. Hephaestus used the fire of the forge as a creative force, but his Roman counterpart Vulcan was feared for his destructive potential and associated with the volcanic power of the earth.
Hera Campana Louvre Ma2283.jpg Hera (Ἥρα, Hḗra)
Queen of the gods and goddess of marriage, women, childbirth, heirs, kings, and empires. She is the wife and sister of Zeus and daughter of Cronus and Rhea. She was usually depicted as a regal woman in the prime of her life, wearing a diadem and veil and holding a lotus-tipped staff. Although she was the goddess of marriage, Zeus’s many infidelities drive her to jealousy and vengefulness. One Iconic affair was one he had with Alcmene, which bore him a son, Heracles. There are several versions with one being that she sent snakes to kill Heracles and another where she adopts him and nurses him. Her sacred animals are the heifer, the peacock, and the cuckoo. In Rome she was known as Juno.

Hermes Ingenui Pio-Clementino Inv544″ by Marie-Lan Nguyen (2009). Licensed under Public Domain via Commons – https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Hermes_Ingenui_Pio-Clementino_Inv544.jpg#/media/File:Hermes_Ingenui_Pio-Clementino_Inv544.jpg

god 800px-Hermes_Ingenui_Pio-Clementino_Inv544

Hermes Ingenui Pio-Clementino Inv544.jpg Hermes (Ἑρμῆς, Hērmēs)
God of boundaries, travel, communication, trade, language, and writing. The son of Zeus and Maia, Hermes is the messenger of the gods, and a psychopomp who leads the souls of the dead into the afterlife. He was depicted either as a handsome and athletic beardless youth, or as an older bearded man. His attributes include the herald’s wand or caduceus, winged sandals, and a traveler’s cap. His sacred animals are the tortoise.
Hestia – Wellesley College – DSC09634.JPG Hestia (Ἑστία, Hestía)
Virgin goddess of the hearth, home and chastity. She is a daughter of Rhea and Cronus and sister of Zeus. Not often identifiable in Greek art, she appeared as a modestly veiled woman. Her symbols are the hearth and kettle. In some accounts, she gave up her seat as one of the Twelve Olympians in favor of Dionysus, and she plays little role in Greek myths. Her counterpart Vesta, however, was a major deity of the Roman state.

GOD 0035MAN_Poseidon

“0035MAN Poseidon” by Ricardo André Frantz (User:Tetraktys) – taken by Ricardo André Frantz. Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Commons – https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:0035MAN_Poseidon.jpg#/media/File:0035MAN_Poseidon.jpg
0035MAN Poseidon.jpg Poseidon (Ποσειδῶν, Poseidōn)
God of the sea, rivers, floods, droughts, and earthquakes. He is a son of Cronus and Rhea and brother of Zeus and Hades. He rules one of the three realms of the universe as king of the sea and the waters. In classical artwork, he was depicted as a mature man of sturdy build with an often luxuriant beard, and holding a trident. The horse and the dolphin are sacred to him. His wedding with Amphitrite is often presented as a triumphal procession. There are some stories that specify an affair with Medusa which led to her giving birth to Pegasus from her neck when Perseus sliced her head. His symbols are the trident, horse, dolphin, fish and bull. His Roman counterpart was Neptune.

Licensed under Public Domain via
god Jupiter_Smyrna_Louvre_Ma13

Jupiter Smyrna Louvre Ma13.jpg Zeus (Ζεύς, Zeus)
King and father of the gods, the ruler of Mount Olympus and the god of the sky, weather, thunder, lightning, law, order, and justice. He is the youngest son of Cronus and Rhea. He overthrew Cronus and gained the sovereignty of heaven for himself. In artwork, he was depicted as a regal, mature man with a sturdy figure and dark beard. His usual attributes are the royal scepter and the lightning bolt, and his sacred animals are the eagle and the bull. His counterpart Jupiter, also known as Jove, was the supreme deity of the Romans.
Primordial deities

SEE MORE GODS AT WIKI https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Greek_mythological_figures

WOULD MARRYING A CYBORG BE SICK CO-DA BEHAVIOR?

BUT NOW I HAVE AN EVEN BETTER QUESTION.  COULD YOUNG SEXY ROBOTS PUT AN END TO CHILD ABUSE?

You might consider the possibility when you see these up and coming anatomically correct dolls.  furthermore scientists are very close to making them highly interactive.  They will talk back, react, and have their own personalities.

Would marrying a cyborg be considered codependent and rooted in addiction?

Would marrying a cyborg be a sin?

SKIP TO THE SEX DOLL PRODUCTION VIDEOS

You wouldn’t really have to “work” at the relationship because the owner of the cyborg would have complete control over his mate.   Manufacturers are already selling complex high sensitivity sex dolls.

Artificial intelligence researcher David Levy at the University of Maastricht in the Netherlands recently completed his Ph.D. work on the subject of human-robot relationships, covering many of the privileges and practices that generally come with marriage as well as outside of it.

NEW FOOTAGE: CLICK ANY OF THESE PHOTOS TO SEE THE NEW VIDEOS

CAMPAIGN AGAINST ROBOTS, WOMAN FEARS REAL WOMEN WILL BECOME OBSOLETE!  See the video it’s hilarious!

sex robot sexy robot sexy young robotsexy twin robotssexy robots 2Sex-Robots

Levy predicts first, sex with robots might be considered geeky, “but once you have a story like ‘I had sex with a robot, and it was great!’ appear someplace like Cosmo magazine, I’d expect many people to jump on the bandwagon,” Levy said.  There will be people, however, Levy said, people like Anthony maybe, for whom a sexbot holds a strong appeal. “I’m hoping to help people,” he said, then elaborated:

“People ask me the question, ‘Why is a relationship with a robot better than a relationship with a human?’ And I don’t think that’s the point at all. For millions of people in the world, they can’t make a good relationship with other humans. For them the question is not, ‘Why is a relationship with a robot better?’ For them the question is, would it be better to have a relationship with a robot or no relationship at all?”

To me (author of article, Lori Edgar, recovered addict), It’s not that the act of marrying a cyborg is dysfunctional but rather, the person who would need that type of relationship must certainly be dysfunctional to a point.  A relationship with a cyborg lacks the social Love and nurturing which are the human essentials of a healthy romantic relationship.   At the same time many alcoholics, addicts, and some normies are so painfully horrible at relationships perhaps a cyborg marriage would be a step up?   However, many times addicts who do recover from addictions move on to have very healthy Loving relationships.  Truly if an addict works the 12 steps thoroughly the fear of people and allowing fear to dominate his actions should be a thing of the past.  Therefore a recovered addict can then have a real healthy long term love affair.

Certainly not all addicts suck at relationships but clearly my own experience shows the majority do suck at it until they stay sober for a few years.  Please; this doesn’t mean we in recovery are bad people it just means that often we were not shown at a young age by our caregivers what a healthy relationship is.  People whose parents are still married tend to be better at staying in a marriage and not engaging in disrespectful behavior toward their mate.  There is a clear similarity here between the “fear of people” or more precisely put the “fear of what people think of me” addressed in the Big Book chapter “How it Works” and a dysfunctional need to be in a relationship with a non-personality, non-human.

But what about just having sex with a human-like cyborg doll?  Couldn’t that just be considered an exotic form of masturbation.  After all masturbation is a socially accepted act and what’s the difference between having a bottle of lotion or a $4,000 cyborg sex doll?   Couldn’t the doll be just another masturbation tool?  Think about the many advantages, manufacturers are saying it’s an alternative to adultery to put it in an acceptable light.

There are stories at the “videos link” of people who have actually fallen in Love with their “Real Dolls” and the dolls give them a reason to live.  Is it our right to judge them?  Absolutely not.  I believe if no one is getting hurt it’s not my business to judge or deny a man his interactive sex doll.  After watching the “Real Life Stories” below I can’t figure out if I am more creeped out or sympathetic toward the lonely men who need their dolls.  The “creeped out” part of me that screams out “that is so f-ing sick!”  Isn’t the side of me that should win out here.   That attitude is based in a lack of understanding and a bit of fear of the unknown.  “Live and Let Live” is the side that should win out in me regarding this topic.

Roxxxy the US$7,000 companion/sex robot is interactive and even has an orgasm!  Roxxxy has a heartbeat and a circulatory system! The circulatory system helps heat the inside of her body.

Roxxy has different personalities which can be matched as close as possible to your own.  The makers “TrueCompanion” say they have a “Rocky” in the works.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/robot-sex_55f979f2e4b0b48f670164e9

In my opinion the Japanese have taken the cake on best looking sex doll

Pic shows: A Japanese company creates a new realistic looking sex doll. Japan's sex doll industry claims to have reached the next level in creating the perfect artificial partner after developing a special realistic feeling skin and authentic looking eyes for a new range of sex dolls. And as these snaps show of the dolls from the company Oriental Industry, there is little to distinguish them from a real girlfriend at least at first glance. Early sales also indicate that buyers of the sex toys approve with a boom in sales for the so-called "Dutch Wives", that sell for just over 1000 GBP each. The sex toys are part of a high-tech industry in Japan constantly looking at ways to make the sex toys as realistic as possible, and the latest models include movable joints designed to place the sex doll girlfriends in whatever position the buyer prefers. The dolls are sold under the name "Dutch Wives" and adverts in Japanese media boast that anyone who buys one will never want a real girlfriend again. Company spokesman Osami Seto said: "The two areas were identified as really needing improvement were the skin and the eyes, and we feel we have finally got something that is arguably not distinguishable from the real thing." The dolls also come with a selection of clothing to prevent the new owner from having to suffer the embarrassment of visiting the local lingerie department. (ends)
A Japanese company claims to have reached the next level in developing the most genuine looking sex doll which comes complete with realistic feeling skin and authentic looking eyes.

Orient Industry says their new range of dolls, made from high quality silicon, are so realistic there is very little to distinguish them from a real girlfriend at first glance.

The dolls, which are non inflatable, are sold under the name ‘Dutch Wives’, a Japanese term for a sex doll, and adverts in the media boast that anyone who buys one will never want a real girlfriend again. JAPANESE DUTCH WIVES SEE HERE  

Top 42 Robo-sex dolls

Humans will be marrying robots within 50 years, according to David Levy, winner of the 2009 Loebner Prize for artificial intelligence.

“People will have fewer problems with robots,” declares Mr. Levy, who cites advances in intelligence simulation that will enable people to carry on long-term relationships with artificial human companions. “Robots will be programmed to be sensitive sex therapists and help them to get over their sexual problems.”
Although such machines won’t initially be cheap, Mr. Levy says he hopes that, as with other electronic products, demand eventually will drive prices down.

Frederic Kaplan, the robotics researcher who co-programmed the brain of Sony’s robot dog Aibo, is skeptical of claims like Mr. Levy’s. He agrees that highly sophisticated sex robots will be available soon but says he doesn’t think they will ever successfully pass as humans.

To rap it all up see the techno video at pornorags.com, “The Top Ten Amazing and somewhat terrifying facts about Al the robot.

READ SOURCE ARTICLE WashingtonTimes.com

WHY IS EVERYBODY’S PROFILE PIC RED AND BLUE?

The Paris National AA Convention just took place not  one week prior to the terrorist attack on Paris.

I don’t usually post non-recovery articles but this ISIS thing is completely out of hand and our brothers and sisters who stayed over from the recent convention could have been injured or killed.   The NATIONAL CONGRESS 55th anniversary AA France Paris 2015
SATURDAY 7 AND SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2015 Just happnened.  I hope you join me in prayer for them and all those suffering from this terrorist attack.

Info on the Paris convention

Why is everybody’s profile pic red and blue is a very good question.

France came under attack late Friday Night and we by changing our pro-pic are supporting the French against the machine gun and bombing attacks.  Isis has claimed responsibility for the attack.

Three teams carried out the attacks in the French capital which killed 129 people and left more than 352 wounded, the Paris chief prosecutor says.  Ninety-nine of the wounded are reported in very serious condition, he said.

“We have to find out where they came from… and how they were financed,” Francois Molins, Prosecutor told reporters.

He said seven attackers had been killed, and that all had been heavily armed and wearing explosive belts

ISIS claimed responsibility in an online statement. The statement said eight ISIS militants wearing explosive belts and armed with machine guns attacked precisely selected targets in the French capital.

It was the deadliest terrorist attack in Europe since the Madrid train bombings of 2004, in which 191 people died. And it came less than two weeks after after a Russian plane crashed in Sinai — downed, intelligence officials believe, by a terrorist bomb — killing all 224 people aboard.
CNN-Find out more about the attacks
Mark Zuckerberg turns his profile pic blue and red in support of France, Paris which has come under attack recently
Facebook Safety Check Helps Parisians, Company Responds To Those In Beirut Asking, ‘Why Not Us’
Facebook deployed its Safety Check feature for Paris Saturday morning, making it the first time it was ever used in connection with terrorist attacks.

Zuckerberg’s Support for Paris

Company CEO Mark Zuckerberg shows his support for France by changing his profile photograph.
Paris was the first test of Facebook Inc.’s Safety Check role in helping improve quick communication during acts of terrorism. The company said in a statement Saturday afternoon: “Safety Check is a relatively new feature and until yesterday we had only activated it in the wake of natural disasters. The product will continue to evolve as we learn more about how it’s used during different crises. We hope to never be confronted with a situation like this again, but if we are, we are of course open to activating the tool given how reassuring it has been for people in Paris.”

CLICK HERE TO SEE I.B.T FACEBOOK PROFILE PIC SUPPORT ARTICLE
Story by Laura Edgar
Sources CNN News Online
International Business Times
BBC Interview with Molins procecuter.

WHY DO MEN RECOVER MORE OFTEN THAN WOMEN?

Statistically Why Are More Men Staying Sober Than Women?

Why is it that there are more men getting and staying sober in the program of AA than women?  Why is it that we women seem to have more emotional issues that need addressing than men?  Partly we just talk about our issues more, men repress on a much larger scale.  Nevertheless we woman that do stay sober are usually more of the “tomboy” type.  The very feminine and highly fragile woman rarely can get through what it takes to stay sober.  Experience teaches that us rough types even often bi-sexual type women have a much higher chance statistically of staying sober than do the frail and feminine. 

Clearly experience teaches it’s the “alpha” females who stay sober in much greater numbers than the more submissive woman.  But we must learn to make ourselves vulnerable emotionally rather than protecting ourselves emotionally. “Sobriety ain’t for sissies!”  So bone up ladies!  You can do it but it’s gonna hurt!  The bad news is…we can feel again, the good news is…we can feel again.  Yes and we have a boat load of emotional issues and character flaws to give to our Higher Power and to ebb-away at. 

Firstly, in my nine years of recovery which ya, hey it is allot of clean-time and I won’t pretend that it isn’t even if it is by the Grace of God.   I have done a hell-of-allot of work on myself, with the help of other women.  And what I have seen in AA is there is only one woman in AA that I have met whom was not sexually abused as a child.  I have silent theories this is the “why” behind most addictions.  The guilt and shame a young child will place on her-self for something she really was not equipped to resist is astounding even life-changing.  We addict woman have learned by the age of ten or younger that we can use our sexuality against men (or women) to control them, manipulate them, and force feed them guilt to get whatever we want from them.

 

We are in recovery now it is time to do our sexual inventory not absent of crimes done to us.  We write how that made us feel but rite now we are addressing our side of the street and cleaning it.  On page…ok ya page 69 in the Big Book Itgives us a long list of questions to ask ourselves.  These question help us with this inventory of our sex based wrongs.     It is imperative for our emotional sobriety that we go over this list honestly and thoroughly and own up to all those that we have manipulated with our sexuality.  Usually the men on our Fourth Step resentment list will also be a big part of our sexual inventory.  In spite of how these men have wronged and abused us it is vital that we see “our part” so we can learn to Love and keep Love close to us and in us.  Yes I am saying Love is of greater importance than anything however we are usually incapable of showing Love and acting out of Love when we are deep in our addiction so that sets sobriety up as a priority before anything else in our lives even Love.

 

Most of us when abused,  didn’t run to an adult and snitch the assailant out, we wanted someone to Love us.  We confused affection with Love and we thought to get Love we had to drop our moral boundaries.  We thought we had to be hurt to get what we needed.  Perhaps that’s what our parents ingrained in us.  And so we turned things around because we are survivors and we used our sexual power accompanied with lies and deception to get what we thought we needed at the time…usually money, drugs, & the basic things like food and shelter.

 

Some of us even sold our bodies outright for money to get drugs.  We were exposed to many disgusting and painful situations.  Some that we barely made it out of alive.  It’s no wonder we learned to hate men.  It’s no wonder we learned to hate women!  They were our competition they betrayed our confidence!  Screw woman! We could not manipulate them as easily.

 

But now we must put our “woman’s issues” on our fourth step.  We will need other women if we are to heal and stay sober.  So we pray for God to put the right woman in our lives so we can experience the “sisterhood of The Spirit”.  Men absolutely are incapable of relating to many aspects of our personalities therefore they are of limited use to us in recovery when working through these core woman’s issues.  If we have a chance to get into a woman’s meeting we DO IT!  These meetings are much more intimate and women will share things that  absolutely will not hear in a regular meeting, shares that are vital for our healing

 

We begin to let our abuses out of our bag of secrets.  We expose some shameful actions of our past in our fifth step with a sponsor and we expose other secrets in the rooms with the woman.  We will find that doing so will put in place the connection that we need to other woman.  When we listen in our women’s meeting we train ourselves to LOOK FOR THE SIMILARITIES RATHER THAN THE DIFFERENCES!

 

Finding someone to criticize is an old survival skill that deflects self-guilt.  Criticism feeds the ego that which it needs to go-on however, criticism is not what we need now…we need empathy, we need healing and that will never come whilst seeking differences so we can criticize others.  We write ourselves a note “seek the similarities don’t criticize!” and we put that in front of us in every meeting we go to until we have trained our brains and have built a bridge over the sick neuron-pathways called addiction.  Our brain-bridge is called “survival for the sober”.  Building a sober brain-bridge takes work and a supernatural kick so we start by ninety meetings in ninety days and we pray for willingness, clarity, guidance, healing, and for HP to make a way where there seems no way.

 

We have deep and imbedded trust issues that simply must be ignored to an extent so we can get what we need.  We may not be able to trust but we will nevertheless choose a sponsor and work the Fifth Step leaving no debauchery uncovered.  That which we want to keep secret the most should be at the top of our fourth step.  The Truth will set us free.

 

We put the “blame-game” in the garbage.  We are responsible for processing every feeling that comes into our hearts.  If we have sex with a person they owe us nothing!  It is our choice weather we have sex and unless we tell the person up-front a price for that sex…they owe us nothing.  Not a phone call, not to fix things for us, not to make our choices for us, nor a place to stay they owe us nothing.  If we expect something from a person we are in bed with then we should be up-front about it.  We can propose that if they are screwing other people we will have to leave the relationship.  They are adult they can do as they please.  They can make promises that they won’t keep.  If they don’t respect us then we leave the relationship it is our choice if we stay therefore blame is off the table.  Granted we can command respect but it is us who must draw the line in the sand and walk away when it is crossed.  We cannot make other adults do anything we can only request and suggest.

 

If we feel we have been wronged we should call a woman and talk it out.  If a law has been broken we may call the cops.  We may find if we talk things out with another woman that it is our unresolved issues that are haunting us rather than the person we are in bed with in the present.  We addicts tend to carry an ink-blotter stamping “guilty” on anyone we are intimate with once the fairy-tale phase of the relationship is over.  Not anymore!  Now we journal, we write “fuck you” letters (do not send) to vent our angers.  We scream in our cars if we have to.  We beat the pillow, we talk it out with woman but we do not blame anyone anymore for our feelings ever.

 

Even if we are wronged…can the person process our emotions?  No!  If others had the responsibility of processing and dealing with our feelings then we would be slaves to other people which we are not.  We are learning how to take responsibility for our lives and our emotions.  It is not easy, not for sissies but you can do it my dear because you are stronger and capable of a deeper Love than most women can even imagine.  Why?  Because of the deep pain you have suffered.

 

Your emotional pain has carved out a deep dark hole in your heart.  You will process that hurt and replace it with Love.  That is why we women in recovery are more capable of a deeper Love than anyone who has not been through the trauma that we have.  Seek God and The Sunlight of The Spirit and you shall be a vessel of joy, Love, and happiness amidst the tears that have gone un-cried for too long.

WHY ADDICTION DIFFERS BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN

 

 

 

CONFESSIONS OF A METH COOK The Untold Stories NOW TOLD!

CONFESSIONS OF A METH COOK

BLOG TALK RADIO OWNS ALL RIGHTS TO THIS CONTENT AUDIO, FACEBOOK OWNS ALL RIGHTS TO THE POSTED LITERARY CONTENT WE THANK THEM BOTH FOR THEIR KIND AND GENEROUS ONLINE SHARE POLICIES. THE LINK TO DALE GARRETT’S AUDIO LIBRARY IS BELOW. Know this: Once you post to Facebook, it belongs to the world.

The Untold Stories NOW TOLD!

Confessions of a Meth Lab Cook is an audio by blog talk radio and Dale Garrett.  Dale Garrett is a wonderful guy who takes his experience strength and hope to the people who need to hear it most.  He makes weekly audio shows at blog talk radio
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/thereslifeafterdrugs

“AS TIME HAS PASSED MANY HAVE SENT TO ME THEIR STORIES OF HOW THEIR LIVES HAVE BEEN TURNED INSIDE OUT BY THE DECISIONS AND ACTIONS THAT THEY MADE, NAMELY ALL LEADING BACK TO THE USE OR MAKING OF METHAMPHETAMINE, NOW THEY HAVE ASKED ME TO SHARE THEIR STORIES IN HOPES THAT BY DOING SO IT WILL SHOW OTHERS THE HORROR AND DEVASTATION THAT COMES ALONG WITH THIS SO CALLED GLAMOURS LIFESTYLE,, SO I INVITE YOU TO JOIN BOTH MYSELF AND MY HOST SARAH BETH AS WE TAKE YOU ON A JOURNEY THROUGH THE LIVES OF 3 YOUNG LADIES LIVES WHO GOT TRAPPED IN THE METH GAME, AND NEARLY LOST EVERYTHING,BUT….THERE IS A LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL, FOR YOU SEE, THEY WERE BLESSED TO BE ABLE TO MAKE IT OUT OF THIS EVIL MADNESS THAT NOW PLAGUES OUR SOCIETY, SO JOIN US IF YOU WILL..FOR OUR SHOW “CONFESSIONS OF A METH COOK “THE UNTOLD STORIES” By Dale Garrett
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/thereslifeafterdrugs

WHO REALLY OWNS YOUR FACEBOOK POSTS?

Your Words and Information http://blogs.findlaw.com/law_and_life/2014/10/who-legally-owns-your-facebook-posts.html

While Facebook may say that you “own” your posts, it turns out that much of the legal impact of your ownership boils down to your privacy settings. Facebook is constantly making changes to its privacy policy, but the bottom line is this: Whatever words or information you post under the “Public” setting are fair game for anyone to use.

That means if you share your recipe on Facebook, and celebrity chef Bobby Flay decides to appropriate it for his next cookbook, you won’t be getting any royalties. This is partially because recipes generally aren’t available for copyright, but most of your posts containing words and information aren’t either.

Your Photos and Videos

Facebook users have slightly more rights to the photos and videos which you post to the site, as those works are easier to protect via copyright. However, Facebook’s terms allow them “a non-exclusive, transferable, sub-licensable, royalty-free, worldwide license to use any IP content that you post on or in connection with Facebook.” In layman’s terms, Facebook has license to use the photos and videos you post (which you own) in any way it sees fit, without paying you, and it can transfer that license to third parties.

Typically, you could sue a company like Facebook for using your image without your permission (or without paying you) under your rights of publicity. But by joining Facebook, you’ve essentially given the company carte blanche to do what it will with your images and videos, not to mention whomever Facebook decides to share your media with.
READ MORE WHAT ARE MY RIGHTS, FACEBOOK POSTS

New International Version

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.

New Living Translation
God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God.

English Standard Version
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

Berean Study Bible
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.

Berean Literal Bible
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.

New American Standard Bible
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

King James Bible
Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

Holman Christian Standard Bible
The peacemakers are blessed, for they will be called sons of God.

International Standard Version
“How blessed are those who make peace, because it is they who will be called God’s children!

Step One of A.A.

Step One

A sponsor is a person who has completed working the 12 steps and now teaches others to work them. One common first step assignment is to read “How it Works” and “The Doctors Opinion” in the Big Book of AA. Another assignment is to write five examples of powerlessness over alcohol or drugs in our own lives. And so we have begun the journey of recovery with a sponsor who has managed to stay sober themselves. What this first assignment does is brings our addiction into the light by listing our powerlessness it keeps us from forgetting we are addicts and prevents us from lying to ourselves by saying…”Yes I can drink responsibly…this time.”

The Doctors opinion shows us that we are definitely not alone and we are not the only ones who have experience the powerlessness of addiction. Powerlessness and the “insanity” of addiction are hard to differentiate between. All powerlessness associated with addiction is insanity but not all inanity exhibits powerlessness.I promised myself I would only have one drink however I woke up after a three day bender asking myself “What in the hell happened?” I promised myself I would never drink or drug again but I did it anyway. I promised myself I would never hurt my loved ones by my addiction yet, again I stole money from my daughter’s piggy bank to buy crack. Ouch! That is serious powerlessness.

Premeditated and guiltless thievery to support my addiction is insane but it is not a show of powerlessness. Accusing my ex-husband of being the reason that I drink and drug because of the way he treats me is insanity but it is not powerlessness. Good luck with your step work!

When we write our examples of powerlessness we should write also how it made us feel. The thing is we addicts usually want to be in complete control. Most of us have intense control issues even. And so we internally beat ourselves to a pulp when we cannot stick to our own using guidelines. Simply put we are expecting ourselves to control something that we are completely incapable of controlling.

We find ourselves in a subconscious state of self-loathing by which we hate us and the world. We did not create our powerlessness nor did we sign up to become addicts. We have no right to condemn ourselves for our powerlessness. We merely accept it and move on to step two.

OUT OF THE PROBLEM INTO THE SOLUTION!

YOUR BRAIN ON PORN

SECONDARY ADDICTIONS ARE VERY TEMPTING

Secondary addictions are what we usually do when we  are in recovery from alcohol and drug addiction.  And usually if we are moving toward progress our second addiction isn’t nearly as destructive as the first…if at all destructive.  We get addicted to coffee, cigarettes, over the counter drugs, pornography, sex, prescription drugs, the internet (guilty) and people.  I am a self professed website junky.  When I ran across this  “YOUR BRAIN ON PORN” I thought it might be interesting to read  and maybe you guys would like it too.

Remember we in recovery usually reach out for some secondary dependencies or lesser addictions when we get sober. You won’t hear it talked about in the rooms much but that’ what we do.

There are two kinds of people in AA those who struggle and admit it and those who struggle and don’t talk about it. We certainly don’t struggle at all times and we do reach a place of peace if we work the steps but we are never finished doing the work while human and alive.

Do not be too hard on yourself for that is a character defect within itself! Come on folks! We are all doing the best we can for right now. From what I have experienced in Narcotics Anonymous the way they sometimes ostracize fellows for secondary addictions it feeds into the sickness of keeping secrets, repressing emotions, and feeds our shame issues. Some groups forbid members to chair meetings if they are on much needed psyche meds or pain meds even non-narcotic meds. Intolerance and a lack of acceptance for others and their personal medicinal status is just that…a lack of understanding and empathy.

In recovery we often struggle with sick relationships (co-dependency), cigarettes, food, sexual promiscuity, anger issues, even your non-narcotic prescription drugs…nevertheless we are doing way better than we were before AA and the 12 steps. Do not think that your recovery is counterfeit if you struggle with one of these? Believe me we all struggle at times. You will find that when one of us overcomes ALL of our little crutches we then become highly judgmental, and our control issues hit their highest peaks. It’s always something! Not a justification just fact. Best we accept ourselves and other as human and remember “OUT OF THE PROBLEM INTO THE SOLUTION”!
This article lists coping skills and dealing with FEELINGS. 

And of course the famous AA pamphlet on “AA and Use of Medication” is found here: http://www.recoveryfarmhouse.net/aa-member-medications-and-other-drugs/

Sobriety Calculator App

FREE GOOGLE PLAY-STORE

Sobriety Calculator App for your smartphone.

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=ru.topot.cleancounter

 

It reminds us just how much we have accomplished and  it has all kinds of kool options like colors, I add my nick-name and clean-date,   It tells me the days clean, hours, even minutes and seconds.  Really kool app that talks to me!  Just click the link to google play store below it even works on your desktop..

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=ru.topot.cleancounter

Description
This application will be useful for recovering addicts and alcoholics.
It calculates the amount of time that has elapsed since that date, in days, months and years, as well as the time in hours, minutes and seconds 🙂
For personalization, in the application it is possible to specify the name and addiction. The significance of gender is used in some regions to correctly display the declination.
It is possible to set an image as the background of the program, or to choose the background color and font of your choice.
Ability to set a password to log in to the application, which would protect this information from unauthorized access.
Three screens: the first person, the second – with a greeting, and screen the exact statistics.
Switching between views by clicking on the display or on the arrows.
Application can make a screenshot and allows them to share in social networks or any message. For example, the screenshot in the first person, with the ability to add your own text – slogan.
There is a widget for your desktop with running minutes and seconds.
There is the option of congratulations on jubilees in the statusbar.
Permission to access the memory card is needed to save screenshots to a folder CleanCounter.
If you want this application to your language – write to topotapps@gmail.com
The application essentially free. Will remain so.
Comments and feedback are welcome)
Wish you the day be clean and sober!

SOBRIETY CALCULATOR

RECOVERY FARMHOUSE WELCOMES YOU! If the Wolfram calculator doesn’t work on your browser scroll down to the “pro calculator” one at the bottom of the page. So sorry developers tend to make stuff that works in only the browser they are using.  The Wolfram will give you more info try it first.

 
Add your Sobriety Date here for calculator to work.
[calc id=3037]

 

THE NINTH STEP PROMISES

If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through.  We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.  We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.  We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace.  No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.  That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.  We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.  Self-seeking will slip away.  Our whole attitude and outlook on life will change.  Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.  We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.  We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

Are these extravagant promises?  We think not.  They are being fulfilled among us____sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly.  They will always materialize if we work for them.